Friday is here, and the weekend is near. Today, I’m writing about blended families. It’s an honor to get to share my work here on Write. Blog. Connect.
In one of those conversations that has stuck with me, my mom said we each only have one family. I agreed, yep, one family, however far extended, however connected. Yet, that thought has grown in my head and really started speaking to me about our blended family.
You know, once you’re a blended family, your family extends to places you never would have imagined. I went to a conference once that talked about how the new wife gets an “ex-wife-in-law” and the new husband gets an “ex-husband-in-law.” This is true, and really applies to this one family concept.
None of our boys talk like they have two separate families. They acknowledge that they have many celebrations twice, but they still just have one family. And while sometimes we want to separate the families in our adult perspective, this is hard on the kids. They love their whole family, and sometimes we have to put our own hurts, anger, and ourselves aside to let our kids express those feelings about people that we don’t share the same benevolence towards.
Oddly, whether by positive or negative feelings, we’re still connected to those people. The kids give us a common or shared thread. And the kids are always the first to suffer when hate, bitterness, or unforgiveness go untreated. They suffer the deepest wounds when their family is filled with discord, miscommunication, and anger.
I pray that as we grow closer as a family within the walls of our home, that we would also recognize that our blended kids have a family that reaches to places that us adults may not like. I pray that even when we fail our sweet babies, that they would recognize that Jesus is enough, that they have a heavenly Father who always acts in their best interest, that won’t abandon them. I pray that He will also send people to help them feel loved, to fill in the gaps, and to help me know what to say and do as we travel along this journey.
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